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Golden Globes! Live blogging!

15.January 2012

10:57: Excellent. Oscar nominations out January 24. We’ll see you back here on February 26 for the Oscars. Unless I feel like blogging the SAGs.

10:55: The Descendants!  Looks like we need to watch that.

10:54: Harrison Ford! What’s going to win best drama?

10:49: Penis joke!

10:48: George Clooney! So charming.

10:47: Natalie Portman looks blooming. But what’s with the wing on her skirt?

10:41: Three cheers for The Artist!

10:40: Meryl is not great at ad libbing.  Or she’s amazing at it.

10:35: Meryl Streep! Need a full length shot of her dress.  Love that she just threw her hair up in a ponytail.

10:34: Tough tough category: Best Actress – Drama.

10:33: Ricky Gervais is looking very thin indeed. And introducing Colin Firth!

10:32: Queen Latifah looks great!

10:27: That was an excellent ad break intro: Colin Firth, Meryl Streep, Tilda Swinton, and Jean DuJardin tap dancing.

10:26: Jean DuJardin is AMAZING. Hooray for an excellent choice.

10:25: Marky Mark! Also, I do NOT like Jessica Biel’s dress. Miss Havisham much?

10:24: Michelle Pfeiffer isn’t that charismatic, really.

10:19: My husband’s cousins with Marky Mark!

10:18: Modern Family seems delightful. I should maybe watch it?

10:16: God bless Antonio Banderas.

10:16: Beer in a wine glass. Classy.

10:14: It’s eyebrow time!

10:13: I don’t know if I’ve said this before, but The Artist is the best movie I’ve seen in YEARS. You should all go RIGHT NOW and see it.

10:11: Robert Downey Junior. Yummm.

10:05: “Hi Elton.”

10:04: Many class acts present tonight.

10:03: Helen Mirren stole Kate Middleton’s ring for earrings.

10:02: Morgan Freeman loves to take a bath in a casket.

9:58: Helen Mirren is a little tipsy. It’s awesome.

9:56: Morgan Freeman deserves a lifetime achievement award.

9:55: Losing interest. But Sidney Poitier is amazing.

9:47: So was The Help good?

9:46: Matt LeBlanc is still around?

9:43: Tina Fey and Jane Lynch! So awesome!

9:42: Emily Blunt is fantastic. And wearing yellow!

9:37: Is Claire Danes’s dress asymmetrical or is it her boobs throwing everything off?

9:35: I vote Mireille Enos. Even if her hair is weird.

9:32: Poor Angie.

9:30: Madonna time! I feel like she’s kind of channeling Michelle Pfeiffer.

9:23: Felicity Huffman and William H. steal my heart. And she’s so shiny!

9:22: Woody. Fine. But The Artist should have won.

9:14: But I thought Tintin wasn’t supposed to be good? Spielberg is so smug.

9:13: That’s a LOT of bronzer and/or shimmery lotion on Jessica Alba. So shiny.

9:11: I love that George Clooney is making fun of Brad Pitt. Slash stole his cane.

9:09: Peter Dinklage is kind of awesome. Yay for him.

9:01: Michelle Williams. Add “anything to do with Marilyn Monroe” to the list of ways to get awards. Right next to Holocaust movies.

9:00: Kate Beckinsale is very pretty. She’s on Dan’s List.

8:59: So much power just in the words “Hi guys.” DAMN.

8:58: Can I be one of his most loyal fans? He’s tasty.

8:57: LUTHER. IDRIS ELBA. If he doesn’t win, I quit.

8:52: A dedicated Darby O’Shea fan comments: “Golden Globe for Best Drama to effing Homeland? Over AHS AND Game of Thrones? #protest” Thoughts?  I don’t have those channels and thus can’t comment.  (But I will say that a fantasy-ish show probably won’t win a Golden Globe. Not until something like Bridesmaids wins an Oscar. Stupid genre-prejudice.”

8:51: Elton does not look happy.

8:50: There are the arms! And she’s wearing one glove! And she’s really really squeezed into that dress. My boobs hurt looking at her.

8:48: Has anyone else even heard of Machine Gun Preacher.

8:47: “I’m sorry I am French….”

8:46: As long as it’s not John Williams… HOORAY!  It’s the guy from the Artist!

8:39: I like Claire Danes’s dress, but really wish she weren’t droopy. She’s giving Dr. Sunkentits competition.

8:37: I’m always disappointed that Kelsey Grammer is not, in fact, Frasier.

8:35: The other one made her mark in comedy by defecating in a sink. And somehow that’s still less demeaning that what you’ve all done to make it in Hollywood.  Or something like that.  Awesome.

8:30: SWINTON. Nutsy-cookoo.

8:28: I haven’t seen Mildred whatever, but I’m pleased for Kate Winslet. Also, she’s a normal shape and I like that.

8:23: Says Dan of Rob Lowe “He’s been drinking too much Sunny D.”

8:22: Julianne and I are going to have to have a talk about her earrings and how I want to rip them off her head and keep them forever.


8:20: ROB LOWE NEEDS TO CUT IT OUT with the tanning. I love Julianne Moore, though. She can do no wrong. I love the zipper/buttons/studs on the back of her dress.

8:13: Tina Fey sneaking in the shot! I love it!

8:13: Best actress in a comedy! I want them all to win! But really, Tina Fey. Or Amy Poehler.

8:13: Ashton Kutcher should be ashamed to be introduced as “from Two and a Half Men”

8:11: “That scene-stealing swine from the outer Hebrides.” Youngsters, take a note: this is HOW to accept an award.

8:10: Yay Christopher Plummer! I love it when the oldies win. Also, he’s SO classy.

8:08: I still love Scorsese’s eyebrows. Always the best part of an awards show. So, supporting actor in a drama… guesses?

8:07: Johnny Depp!! So pretty. Even with his silly floppy hair. Um. Also, I’d like him to please read to me. Even just the phonebook.


8:04: Elton John looking unimpressed, Leonardo DiCaprio looking too earnest, Helen Mirren eating a roll. Love it.

8:03: Amy Poehler looks lovely.

8:01: I just saw Meryl Streep. Um.

8:00: There was Helen Mirren! I do like Ricky Gervais with a beard.

7:58: Did Meryl Streep and Swinton just SKIP the E! people?!

7:53: What do we think of Salma Hayek’s dress? I think I love it. Very Metropolis-chic.

7:52: Two things: Jodie foster looks amazing. and Claire Danes REALLY needs a bra.

7:48: Evan Rachel Wood for the WIN.

7:46: Jessica Alba looking lovely. But SHINY. Is that canola oil?

7:45: Where the EFF is Meryl Streep? SERIOUSLY!  Also, we are NOT served by  closeups on the red carpet!

7:44: Jessica Biel SANS engagement ring. And I LOVE Maya Rudolph! Great dress!

7:41: Madonna … I don’t know. It’s like a little rock and roll, but not quite. I wish she had her hair up.  Who’s the woman with her!? Because she’s wearing Vivienne Westwood and I want to make out with her dress.

7:39: Lea Michele. She’s lovely, but her dress is NOT.

7:38: Diana Agron looks AMAZING! Did anyone catch who designed it?! It looks like Tord Boontje’s stuff!

7:32: Reese Witherspoon is presenting her BOOBS tonight! 10:1 nip slip territory.

7:32: Tina Fey looks great, but her hair needs to deflate. Nicole Kidman looking WACKADOO. Kind of awesome. Need to process that one.

7:30: Heidi. Boring and DROOPY! Nice ass, though. Lea Michele: not great.

7:29: Kate Winslet… Not sure.

7:28: Mila Kunis looks lovely.

7:25: Reese Witherspoon looking exactly the same as she always does. Michelle Williams in cut/burned velvet – she’s adorbs, but shouldn’t be wearing a couch.

7:20: Angelina’s talking about war and genocide, Brad’s talking about baseball. I really like the top of Angie’s dress, but the rest of it is meh.

7:18: Let’s all pause for Brangelina.

7:12: I want Kate Beckinsale’s earrings.

7:11: Charlize Theron looks gorgeous, but I’m not totally on board with the pouf. I wish Charlize would say something off-color.

7:09: Jonah Hill is channeling the young Republicans.

7:08: Jezebel liveblogging now!

7:05: Kristin Wiig: Not loving the nude. Evan Rachael Wood: LOVE HOLY SHIT FEATHERS WOW.

7:04: Berenice Bejo! LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE!

7:02: Brad and Angelina looking pretty great. Brad greasy and bebearded, but Angelina looks stunning.

6:58: FUCKING SPOILERS. Pardon my French, but that’s BAD red carpet etiquette.

6:55: Charlize Theron looking BEAUTIFUL. Love the headband, love the assymetrical hair.

6:54: BONES! And Zooey! Both looking lovely!

6:50: Rooney Mara is pretty badass.  Nina Ricci! Interesting.  It’s very Morticia Addams.

6:48: Julie Bowen’s dress is pretty. Like the sleeves.

6:46: Sofia Vergara STUNNING in Vera Wang. That’s my new favorite color.

6:45: Frieda Pinto: beautiful Prada and Chopard necklace.  What’s that fabric? is it quilted?

6:37:  Diane Lane. Pretty dress. I’d hit that.

6:35: Rooney Mara! But I couldn’t see her dress! Oooh. It’s something tulle and low cut. GREAT eye makeup.

6:33: Who’s the girl from The Descendants? Her dress is pretty!

6:32: I do like Nicole Richie’s dress though.

6:30: Let me Reiterate: Ariel Winter rocks. Also, is that Nicole Richie in the silver dress? Her hair is INSANE. Dan says: “looks like a 60s sci-fi vixen”

6:29: I don’t know who Paula Patton is, but she looks GREAT in yellow.

6:27: You guys! A complaint: My Esteemed German Colleague in GERMANY has already seen Meryl Streep. WHY HAVEN’T I!

6:25: I LOVE Sarah Michelle Gellar’s dress.  I don’t love her roots.

6:24: I love Melissa McCarthy. I like – but do not love – her dress.

6:23: Amanda Peet … Christine put it best “she’s wearing lampshade from the 80s… maybe the 70s.”

6:21: Who was that in the blue and white dress?!

6:18: GoFugYourself! They’re liveblogging! Here.


6:15: Piper Perabo: awkward dress. That Ariel girl from Modern Family: adorable “I want either a puppy or a cell phone.” Also, Dan just pointed out if she’s 13, she’s probably named after The Little Mermaid.

6:08: Kelly Osbourne, we need to talk (no, not about your hair). If you’re going to be on national TV and comment on people’s fashion you NEED to be able to pronounce the designers’ names.

6:06: Who’s this Ross character?

6:05: “Yessss! That wall art was from me!” Ugh.

6:03: George Clooney. Gorge.

6:02: Ricky Gervais looking swank in a red suit and Ray Bans. I like the beard.

6:00: It’s Ryan Seacrest time! So much plastic!

5:53: Lea Michele has NINE tattoos? So not white bread!

5:52: I don’t care about Charlize Theron’s tattoo, but I hope she curses on the Red Carpet.

5:40: Everytime I hear the phrase “Colin Firth’s wife” a little bit of me dies. *sob*

5:38: Giuliana is trying to be Ricky Gervaisy with her Lindsay Lohan’s publicist joke. Not the same.

5:37: While we’re waiting for real celebrities to show up, look at this.

5:33: Everybody must be kind of relieved that Mad Men didn’t run this year. I mean, those nominated. Obviously not us.

5:32: People I’m looking forward to seeing on the red carpet:

  • Alec Baldwin – for the snark
  • Rooney Mara – for the fashion
  • Brad Pitt – for the dimples, provided he’s shaved his beard
  • SWINTON – for general badassery and lack of eyeliner
  • Any and everyone from THE ARTIST, which is the best movie I’ve seen in YEARS.
  • Kenneth Branagh – for Gilderoy Lockheart fabulosity
  • Tina Fey and Amy Poehler – because I want to be friends with both of them

5:26: Oh GOD. They’re going to be advertising the Kardashians on every single ad break, aren’t they?

5:21: Scary arms alert! Madonna’s going to be at the Globes this year! Will Ricky Gervais make a joke about them?

5:20: And Giuliana has already mentioned pilates and Master cleanses. Ugh.

5:19: Here are the nominations: GG Nominations

5:15: Kelly Osbourne needs to stop saying “obsessed.” Also, I hate (vehemently) that hair color. Except on Tavi Gevinson.  Furthermore: I’m about to add Joan Rivers to the Dick Clark club. It might be just about time to retire, dear.

5:12: Hi all!  Sorry to be a stranger. No promises that I’m going to keep it up and post all the time, but I’ve returned for the traditional Golden Globes liveblog.  Things I’m thinking about this time:

  • I haven’t seen almost any of the movies nominated. So my predictions and/or preferences will simply be based on how much I like and/or hate particular people.  So there.  Grain of salt, people.
  • I’m going to say up front that I feel terrible for Guiliana Rancic with the breast cancer and surgery and everything.  That being said, I still think she’s terrible at red carpet interviews. So I’ll probably still complain about her.
  • I hope Ryan Seacrest continues to make an a$$ of himself as usual.
  • I think that’s all.
28 Comments leave one →
  1. wjh permalink
    15.January 2012 18:41

    5:40: Everytime I hear the phrase “Colin Firth’s wife” a little bit of me dies. *sob

    >>> same here. sigh.

  2. wjh permalink
    15.January 2012 18:44

    also, i want to be there to watch with you!!

  3. 15.January 2012 19:15

    Claire Danes needs some undergarments… non?

    • Darby O'Shea permalink*
      15.January 2012 19:33

      YES. So does Piper Perabo in the ridiculous seethrough dishcloth.

  4. wjh permalink
    15.January 2012 19:39

    6:27: You guys! A complaint: My Esteemed German Colleague in GERMANY has already seen Meryl Streep. WHY HAVEN’T I!

    >>> pffffft. i thought you’d be HAPPY for ME.

    or watch here:

    • 15.January 2012 19:47

      Still no sighting here!

    • Darby O'Shea permalink*
      15.January 2012 19:53

      Why would I be happy for you when I could feel sorry for myself!?\

  5. 15.January 2012 19:46

    Freida in Prada!

  6. 15.January 2012 19:58

    holy hair gel, Jonah Hill!
    Viola Davis looks stunning!

  7. 15.January 2012 20:02


    • Darby O'Shea permalink*
      15.January 2012 20:07

      Yes, but K! What do you think of Evan Rachael Wood?!

      • wjh permalink
        15.January 2012 20:08

        I WANT THE DRESS!!!!!

      • 15.January 2012 20:15

        Didn’t see it! But if it resembles Mary J Blige’s, I won’t like it…

  8. 15.January 2012 20:30

    KATE WINSLET!!!!!!!!!

    • Darby O'Shea permalink*
      15.January 2012 20:36

      Do we like it? Sexy schoolmarm? Not sure.

      • wjh permalink
        15.January 2012 20:39

        We do!

        Good night, ladies!

  9. 15.January 2012 20:40

    LOVE Diane Agron from head to toe! HATE Lea Michelle’s dress!

  10. 15.January 2012 20:50

    Woman with Madonna is “Wallace Simpson” in her new movie! Actually looks really good. The film, that is.

  11. 15.January 2012 20:52

    Jodie Foster looks gorgeous!

  12. wjh permalink
    15.January 2012 21:04

    Hooray! Original sound on German TV!!

  13. 15.January 2012 21:12

    Ewan is SUCH a dish!!

  14. 15.January 2012 21:14

    Laura Linney is soo lovely!

  15. mandy permalink
    15.January 2012 21:56

    Madonna. Oh but of COURSE. “This is a surprise!” No, it’s not.

  16. 15.January 2012 22:02

    signing off for Downton! xo

  17. Amy Pirt permalink
    29.February 2012 23:10

    The woman with Madonna is Andrea Riseborough. She’s a brilliant actress – she was in Never Let Me Go and played a very convincing young Maggie Thatcher in The Long Walk to Finchley.

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